Joy For This Journey

Thursday, November 8

"I Can Only Imagine"

"For our momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all "2 Cor.4:17

I had a surgery for my bad should in 2001, it went bad on me meaning the first surgeon did it "wrong" (or should I say he was "inexperienced and messed up") to actually make my problem shoulder even worse than before I went in to correct a lifelong problem. I had a lot of pain after and no one really understood what I was saying..it felt "wrong" from the moment I left the hospital. I gave it some time and went to physical therapy. I tried to trust the doctor that it "needed time to recover". To jump ahead for the sake of keeping your attention..I was laying flat inside the MRI chambers back in 2003.. Getting a "second opinion" on this same shoulder the MRI technician asked if I would like to listen to a radio station while in the enclosed and rather "tight" machine I was now entered. I could tell I would need a diversion from the entrapped enclosure because my 'bad' shoulder was in a lot of pain and I was only in there for about 10 minutes. I asked her how long would I be trapped inside the chamber, she said "about 2 hours"! "Ok, yes.. Please can I listen to a Christian music station". I remember the lady giving me the headphones and started the music the second she pushed the play button a Mercy Me song starts to play "I can only imagine what it will be like when I walk by your side, I can only imagine what my eyes will see when your face is before me. Surrounded by glory what will my heart feel, will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still....I can only imagine". My eyes filled up with tears, I sensed the holy spirit in my life as I laid there helpless to my situation. I had to just surrender my shoulder issues to God and He was present.
I will tell you this, that moment spoke to me like none other and God touched me. I had been going through about 9 months of questioning why my shoulder was worse off and in more pain since the surgery and this moment I feel God was going to answer why and what was really wrong with it.. He chose to allow me to go through pain and uncertainty to strengthen me in Him. I feel "God gives us our time on earth to build and strengthen our character for heaven." But He is so good and loving to us that He still allows us to make that choice. It's our choice to accept pain and struggle with grace and thankfulness and a blessing he is working on or we can stiffen our neck and attitude and not rejoice in it. I choose to go the way of grace and accepting. It's not easy, it's just possible.

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